I do most of the shopping at our house. Sometimes, I shop at Costco. Not every week, but, when we’re low on paper towels or cans of black beans or maybe granola, I schedule a stop. Most Costco items are large volume, but we have some storage space in the basement.
Last time I bought dryer sheets at Costco I had a memorable thought. I recall that, as I reached for the bundle of four large boxes of dryer sheets, a question flashed through my mind – will I ever buy dryer sheets again? This was not a mathematical query comparing how many times the earth goes around the sun to how many loads of laundry I have left to do.
The real question I was asking myself is ‘how much longer will I be alive?’ I was wondering out-loud how many more times I would be able to go shopping. Just asking the question helped me to appreciate going to the market to buy food, helped me to appreciate what I usually just take for granted.
Aging with intention can help us appreciate what we usually take for granted. Just getting older doesn’t guarantee this type of wisdom, but it does offer the possibility. It's like the difference between floating downstream versus consciously steering your boat - both will take you somewhere, but intentional aging gives us more agency in the journey.
Conscious aging isn't about denying the process or surrendering to it, but rather about engaging with it. This could help transform aging from something that happens to us into something we actively participate in shaping.
Have you ever wondered if this is the last bunch of dryer sheets, or bunch of anything, that you might buy before you die? Is that too morbid a thought? Why is thinking about something inevitable, like our own death, so morbid? One of the first things that caught my attention about conscious aging was that so many of us fear and deny our own aging.
Last week I used the last dryer sheet in that big bundle of four boxes. And, even after a recent bout with COVID, not to mention my bypass heart surgery, I’m here, doing the laundry.
During the COVID lockdown, I was fortunate to be able to do my shopping online and have it delivered to my front door. I needed some more shaving cream, but my usual brands were out of stock online, so I ordered what they had available – colloidal oatmeal shave cream. I would have never bought this stuff if I didn’t have to. Indeed, I didn’t even know colloidal oatmeal shaving cream even existed. And, actually, it is quite good.
This morning, as I squeezed the tube of shave cream completely dry, I grinned a goodbye to that new friend.
Yes, I have already bought more of that shave cream, so it’s not a total goodbye, but it was actually a poignant moment for me. I don’t know which is my last time buying dryer sheets or shaving cream, or even waking up in the morning. We all have a last time for something. Let’s embrace both the difficulties and the opportunities that aging with intention can offer us.